The IVF class was over three hours with no break. I thought I was going to starve to death. I had missed lunch yesterday b/c of a meeting and didn't have time to eat before the class. I brought along chips but my husband scolded me when I tried to eat them during the class. He said it was distracting, but meanwhile others were eating. I guess my stomach growling every few minutes wasn't distracting for him.
So it was past 9 by the time we got out of the class. We had a 45 minute drive home and I still hadn't eaten. The problem was that I had a blood test this morning that I had to fast for and I knew that even if we made it home by 10 I wouldn't have time to eat if I was giving blood at 7 am. So I started to panic a bit I admit. My husband suggested we stop at a restaurant...not something he ever does. I mean we never eat in restaurants b/c he thinks they are dirty and a waste of money. Getting him to go to a restaurant even for a special occasion is near impossible. Anyway, we finally find a place that's still open in this suburban hell and we are waiting for our food when we get into a terrible fight. He's trying to keep his cool b/c we are in public but I could tell he was ready to explode. He left me alone at the table just as the food was arriving. I asked the waiter to wrap his up and I sat alone and ate my dinner knowing that it would be a miserable ride home, which it was.
When we got home he didn't want to do the shot. Of course not. He had to punish me. Now it was close to 11 and I was beyond panicked. There was no way I could do the shot myself, especially the first one. After about a half hour he finally came over to the table where I was crying on all the syringes and he did it.
Sometimes I really wonder how I got to this point. Is this really my life?
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5 comments:
I'm so sorry. What a crappy day and evening to have, and for the Mister to take out his whatever on you was completely unfair - especially considering you needed that shot.
I hope today has gone better.
DH and I have a wonderful relationship, but fertility treatments even gave us some problems. It's emotionally trying and physically exhausting. If the two of you go into it with open minds, knowing that you'll both get hot-headed about the whole process then you'll be much better off.
Wishing you sunnier days.
What an awful night. Sometimes it just seems to get worse and worse.
Hope all is forgiven now.
It is mind blowing to wonder how we got here, huh?
I'm sorry that yesterday was so bad for you. I hope that today is better after you two had a chance to sleep off the experience.
I's so sorry you had such a rough night. I know I've said it before but you're on my prayer list and I'm so hoping you get pregnant on the first try so you can move past all this stress.
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