baby c

baby c is not doing so hot. i heard all three heartbeats today but my doctor thinks baby c will terminate shortly. he says it's likely sick. if it doesn't happen naturally, he says we'll have to test it in a few weeks and talk about what to do. a and be are doing just fine.

morning sickness every evening

i just puked again...it happens ever night around this time. i'm not complaining ok..? glad to be puking, but can someone tell me how to make it stop? no food appeals. i've been eating a lot of french fries which i know is unhealthy but everything makes me sick. and smells... everything i smell makes me sick.

and my husband...well, he has to have his own sickness every time i'm not feeling well. he's always been this way...i'd get a cold and he'd get sick. i'd have a headache, he'd be in pain. now it's just annoying. he's sleeping right now b/c he isn't feeling well. surprise...he hasn't been feeling well since i started puking several days ago. how convenient.

A, B and C

My doctor says to me this morning during the ultrasound...did we discuss the possibility that there might be three..? NO, I say. He says, well,...there are three.

6 weeks tomorrow

tomorrow's the day. we are supposed to be able to hear the heartbeats. i'm very nervous. my husband and i have hardly acknowledged to each other what's happening...he's been holding out until the heartbeats. maybe then it'll be real to him.

meanwhile the nausea continues everyday and for the last three nights i've woken up at crazy hours "starving". i've had to get up and eat b/c there is simply no ignoring it.

i've read that you aren't supposed to gain weight in the first month, but my pants are all too tight. i don't want to keep buying bigger clothes so i think i'm going to check out Chico's this week. i hear all their pants are elastic. i guess for a while i'll just look like i'm getting fat? i want to jump to the stage where i can where cute maternity clothes.

uggh. ok, please keep your fingers crossed for tomorrow.

oops, it just snuck out

i tooted really loud in the shoe store today. i couldn't contain it. generally i'm not a very gassy person but it's out of control. i've got a meeting all morning tomorrow...i'm hoping this stage doesn't last long or i might alienate my co-workers.

chicken pot pie and vanilla ice cream

the morning sickness came late today...around 2:00. nothing appeals except chicken pot pie and vanilla ice cream. i haven't had chicken pot pie in years so i'm not sure where this craving is coming from. i had a hamburger yesterday...red meat. i don't do that very often but i'm trying to satisfy whatever craving i get since the thought of most food makes me want to puke.

my MIL keeps calling and asking for an update. she was here the day of the transfer three weeks ago so she is expecting news. i had not wanted anyone to know, as i've explained multiple times, but she was in my house that day...here's how it went down.

my in-laws were in town visiting over passover. at the seder, they got a call from overseas and my FIL had to make immediate arrangements to fly the next day. long story short...my FIL didn't have his passport with him since he had not anticipated flying overseas, so my husband agreed to fly across the country to pick up the passport and fly back to the east coast...all in one day. This way my FIL wouldn't kill himself flying to get the passport and then catching a 10 hour flight overseas. My husband left early the next morning and several hours later I got the call for the transfer. We were really hoping for a five day transfer but it was three and my husband was on a plane. oh well.

anyway, I had 45 minutes to get to the doctor so I was rushing around. I told my in-laws I had to go to the clinic but I didn't explain why. upon my return, I just wanted to get into bed, put my feet up, relax and focus on my embryos implanting. however my SIL and her family soon arrived and I had two little ones running around my very small apartment chasing our cat. then my SIL decided she wanted to shower and then bathe the kids. then they all had to eat of course. and the whole time I was trying to lay low, not wanting to explain anything but fearing they would interpret my behavior as rude. it was insane...i mean the house was a total zoo on the one day i just needed to chill out. and the worst part was that my husband wasn't there. i had gone thru the whole thing alone, only to return to a house full of his family. it worked out so i shouldn't complain. so i had a pile of wet towels, mcdonalds wrappers and chaos everwhere...but the thing that really bothered me was that they didn't wait on me...they knew i went thru something yet, they didn't bring me lunch in bed or anything. i didn't ask though but still, wouldn't you have offered?

so my MIL calls every day for the results. she even asked my mom if she knew anything and boy did my mom give it to her...she told her that when i have something to tell them i will tell them. my mom doesn't have a whole lot of patience for my MIL

A and B

I had my blood work and ultrasound yesterday. My beta was 11,800 and there were two sacks. -I think that's what the doctor called them...A and B. We won't know for sure however until we hear/see the heartbeats in another week. I can't believe how quickly this is going. Question...do we still tack on the two weeks to my pregnancy even though we know when conception was? I can't find the answer to this. Am I three weeks pregnant since that's when the transfer was or am I five weeks pregnant because they count two weeks before for women who conceive the natural way. Maybe you know what I'm talking about..? It makes a big difference since we have to wait until three months to tell people. It's my understanding that pregnancy is 40 weeks b/c of those two weeks they add on in the beginning.

My husband thinks I'm already gaining weight. I don't think it's baby weight...too soon for that. I'm just eating a lot. He thinks my boobs look bigger too...I think it's wishful thinking on his part. We reduced the progesterone last night but a shot in the bum is a shot regardless. I'm so bruised it looks like someone's beating me.

That's really all. I drink a ginger ale every morning and pop ginger pills when I feel sick...it seems to help. I think the trick is to always have a full stomach but it's hard to eat when you feel sick.

not talking about it

i told my mom last night...i had to, she's my mom and i couldn't keep a pregnancy from her any longer. if it all goes well (please God) i'll be the first of the children to reproduce. she was a bit freaked out though. she told me it's too early to talk about it...we must not talk about it. she's apparently more superstitious then i am. and i am not to bring anything baby related into the house...not until it's born. ok, we won't talk about it.

didn't sleep much last night due to cramps. i've read it's my uterus expanding. i'm constantly eating. i had two lunches yesterday. i can't statisfy the hunger. i know i'm not supposed to be eating for two yet (or three) but i'm hungry.

cute acupuncture guy called me yesterday to say he had heard and congratulations. he's such a sweet guy! i wish i knew someone to hook him up with.

that's all.

Pregnant But Not Ready to Put It Out There

I went in for another blood test this morning. I love getting up early on my only day off to drive 45 minutes so someone can stick a needle in me. Anyway, my beta doubled so it's apparent I'm pregnant. I'm not admitting that out loud yet. My husband doesn't understand why we can't tell our family yet. He thinks that if anything goes wrong, G-d forbid, that our families should know too. I've tried repeatedly to explain to him that it just isn't done. We must wait until the second trimester. I'm sure he won't be able to keep it quiet...he'll tell his parents and make them promise not to say anything. Then his mother will tell the rest of the family and make them promise not to say anything. Then she'll call me and drop hints that she knows. That's my in-laws. I'm just so freaking scared that something will go wrong.

bring on the morning sickness

while giving blood for my pregnancy test yesterday i experienced morning sickness for the first time. i was overcome by queasiness and the nurse noticed and offered me juice. she thought it was from taking my blood, but i never watch the process and i'm a regular at it obviously, and i never had this feeling before. i got home and the nausea continued until about 2:00. until i got the call from my nurse i was praying it was morning sickness. once i got the call i was certain and i couldn't be happier. bring it on! i'm eating crackers right now and trying not to puke. i'm not gonna complain about any of it, i'm just so freaking thankful! oh, and the constipation started several days ago...i wasn't sure if that was a symptom. i can't go. i still have cramping every time i pee too. (tmi?- sorry). i guess i knew i was pregnant but i didn't want to admit it.

could someone please comment on my 540 beta after a 12 day transfer? my nurse says it's likely more than one. i spent the day surfing looking for any indication as to how many it might be. i found that people with twins had between 200-400. Could it be three? I know i've got a long way to go and anything could happen but i'm terrified of three. my husband said that since we had icsi we could actually end up with more than three.

IT'S POSITIVE!

The nurse just called. It's positive. My level is 540 so she said it's likely more than one. Two would be great...three would be challenging. I can't believe it!