it's been a while. i just haven't had any reason to write. i start the lupron again tomorrow. i don't know how i'll survive if this ivf cycle fails.
had a situation at work today that totally suked and i can't stop thinking about it. i'm so embarrassed. i called a parent to discuss her child's behavioral problems in class. the woman became hysterical and abusive when i told her about his inappropriate and disrespectful behavior. i stayed calm- i've dealt with crazy parents before. but then she said something like...do you have children? maybe if you had children you'd know what to do. so i yelled back...no, i don't have children...i can't have children for your information. i just got so pissed. how dare she make it personal. i called to inquire what the best way is to deal with her child and she attacked me. i know this woman has no idea what i'm going thru but i just lost it when she said that. insensitive bitch! thing is that i yelled it in my office and there were two other people who heard it in the office next door. i'm so humiliated. now everyone will know i can't have kids. i'm such an idiot.
8 comments:
That's rough, I know how that feels... look at the bright side: at least now people won't be wondering about it, whispering behind your back as to whether or not you're capable.
That said (I hope it didn't come out wrong!), some parents are just over-protective of their kids, and will never admit their kids do something wrong. It's just one of the reasons my mom told me never to go into education (she's been in education her whole life.)
I can imagine how mad you must have been and I'm glad that you said something to that parent. I think it stresses me out more when I just say, "Oh, if it's meant to be, we'll have kids." What I really want to say is, "Are you kidding me...don't you think I would have kids by now if I could!"
I'm sorry the cats out of the bag. Hang in there.
sorry to hear about you rough day! some people are just so insensitive! dont beat yourself up to much for shouting...
thinking of you and good luck for this IVF
charne trollip is right. Don't beat yourself up. That parent was being insensitive and it pushed a very senstive button for you. Maybe it will teach her to be more respectful and senstive when she is talking to people in the future. Besides, she was just feeling guilty about her child's behavior, which I guessing she aleady knew was a problem or she would have lashed out at you. Hang in there.
You're not an idiot...I'm a teacher and I find it incredibly inappropriate when people say things like that and they do it A LOT! Where do they get off? I think your reaction was a reaction that so many people have wanted to have and so be it. You shouldn't be embarrassed...I know it's hard, but we didn't do anything to "deserve" this.
A response that I have found quite useful is "that has nothing to do with the extensive education and training that I have gone through to deal with your child. I am acting as an educator here, not as a parent...that's your job." It shuts them up immediately! She owes you an apology...don't worry about your co-workers...sometimes it's better if someone at work knows anyway. Good luck and keep trucking!
i stumbled on your blog via another and can identify with this 100% as i teach and often we have to do this uncomfortable thing of telling parents the TRUTH and of course the truth always hurts, but do they really think we like saying it? let it go 'whoosh' over your head if you can.
I think you are a saint for teaching. I know I could never do it. A lot of parents out there are idiots and give teachers a hard time. I came here via Lost and Found. I wish you all the best on your upcoming cycle.
Agreed - Don't beat yourself up. I tried to keep my IF issues under my hat, but at one point, I spouted off so bad about it - mad - that I felt terrible. What I didn't realize is that it was a needed slap in the face for the person I yelled at. She had absolutely no idea the extent of my pain and how hurtful the salt was that she was dumping into my wounds. Things were so much better after that point - and I think it was my emotional turning point also where I became able to talk about it openly.
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